Friday, April 17, 2009

Funky Dance.

Last night I made 40 chocolate pudding "dirt" cups for cub scouts.

The theme was "Jurassic Pack."

I was going to do something very low maintenance like yogurt pretzels and m&m's (dino bones and eggs). But then I thought I should be a tad more scouting homemakerish. And so I made something with a jello product. Which definitely did the trick. I was very proud of myself.

Plus who doesn't love dirt cups?

Lately, I've been feeling a little in-a-funk funky.

I'm in a place somewhere between homemaker and career girl. But not really either.

I love making and keeping a home and can't wait to be a mother.
And I also love having a job and contributing monetarily to the building of my family.

The guilt I feel for being out of a job right now is big. And even though Dashing Boy is supportive of my in-between-ness, I'm hard on myself about it. And although I know most of it is me being sensitive, it feels like others are hard on me about it too, saying little comments in conversation.

The truth is, I am very blessed. Three years ago, Dashing Boy and I went crazy, working extra to pay off debt, establish an emergency fund, and stick to a budget. During this time, we've been working hard to be able to live off of only Dashing Boy's income, so that one day I can be home with kids.

That means not eating out much, or planning extra to go to a full-price movie (which we haven't done in months). It means, eating random meals when we've spent the allotted grocery budget. It means saving a little each month so birthdays and Christmas don't sneak up on us. It means the world to me, and I feel so humbled and blessed to have a husband that is fully behind this plan. It's a choice. With purposeful budgeting this choice sometimes let's us treat someone to a meal, or buy a few fancy chocolates, planned and prioritized.

For most of this time, I've been working full-time +. And it's been wonderful. And then we moved and for a few months I worked just bits and pieces. I organized our house, and nested and you know what? It was wonderful, and hard, and temporary, and worked for us.

Career-wise, I want to contribute the most and best to my family in whatever way possible. That's what is most important to me.

So right now the job search is on, but I'm taking my time a bit, praying, and being in tune to the needs of my family.

And so I'm grateful.
for the Lord,
for my family,
for my funk,
for 10-year-old awkward/sweet cub scout boys,
for nesting,
for baking,
for serving,
for life.


Geoff & Cami Brown said...

Thanks for sharing. This post made me smile and made me grateful to know you!

Natalie said...

Oh these are so cute! I'm doing Earth Day stuff for work and I want to make cupcakes, frost them and then put oreo crumbs on top with a gummy worm. Do you think that would work?

Jenny said...

Natalie: Yes! That would be adorable! That's a great idea! I might follow suit...!

candace said...

jenny, I get where you're coming from! my suggestion (not that you're looking for one) is to find a nice happy some part time work, and make it something you enjoy...and then you'll still have free time to be at home.