Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Life is Sweeter With Girl Friends.

"There isn't a definition in our culture for this kind of bond between women."-Oprah (when speaking about her friendship with Gayle King)

When I was just one-year-old I was blessed with a female cousin that would forever occupy a space in my heart.

A kindred spirit.

I have a plethora of fantastic childhood memories with K: preparing songs and dances (sometimes very dramatic in nature) to perform at family functions. Learning that metal does not belong in the microwave after we tried to melt otter pops in an easy-bake-oven pan. Practicing countless times the scene from It Takes Two where Mary Kate and Ashley accidentally bump into each other for the first time and discover that they have a twin!

When we started our periods K. and I read each other the tampon instructions piece by piece for days, completely perplexed.

Childhood through puberty through college and now, K. has been there.

We cry with each other over hard things, and things that seem hard but are really silly. And we laugh until our stomachs hurt.

Conversations with K. frequently go something like:
K: Ok, what do you have going on?
Jenny: This, that, blah blah. What do you have going on?
K: This, that, blah blah.
Then we decide who should go first with the talking and who should go first with the listening. And the talker will talk until she is ready, then say to the listener "Ok. You go," and then the talker will listen.

I can't even count the times either of us have shown up at the others house in tears (hundreds?) ready for an understanding smile and a place where we can just be whatever and it's ok. Even if we're being ridiculous.

I took that picture of K. one night when she showed up at my house in her Dad's shoes, slipping on the easiest pair as she left her house. It's beautiful. I love it.

You'd think these dramatic antics would slow down now that we're reaching (reached?) (nah) adulthood. But oh no. I have come to appreciate this bond more and more immensely.

Because sometimes you just need a shoulder to cry on. Or a sister like friend to snuggle with as you watch Lifetime movies. Sometimes you need a friend to listen to your dreams and fears, and let you be happy or sad, or whatever. And sometimes you need someone to slap you back into reality and suggest that instead of talking about serious stuff, you can only talk about Brangelina.

And when such times arrive, no one but a best girl friend will do.


candace said...

ha ha, what's funny is I totally recognized K. in the picture before reading the blog!! And I agree--we all need people that support us when we need it.

Heidi said...

Amen! You're a poet.

Anonymous said...

that was really a dramatic post, ;D jk